Move Over Jose Mourhino because its official, Christiano Ronaldo is the
ultimate high maintenance brat of World Football

I know I’m going to get an absolute barrage of hate mail, but honestly, can someone tell me what is so great about Christiano Ronaldo?

The guy plays for the most expensive club in the world, gets paid an inordinate of money and has only managed to come second at best in every single trophy he has attempted to win after leaving England? A quick look at the career of the last 12 odd months of Portugals MOST spoilt brat (Sorry Jose, you can’t be the king of everything) will explain why Christiano Ronaldos last few moments were probably more than just anger at having lost the World Cup, try lost everything attempted so far this year instead.

A rough time line will do wonders to illustrate my point here:

– Mid/Late 2009 –

Ronaldo leaves everything he has ever known at Manchester United to play at Real Madrid in a squad that can only be dubbed as ‘El Galactico’s II’. He is earning more than anyone else in football as a result and fulfills his dream of playing for Real Madrid. His Real Madrid jersey sales in the first two weeks after the announcement pay for nearly 10% of the entire transfer. Back orders of his jersey are taken in an attempt to satisfy the masses.

Late 2009 –

Spain is in love with Ronaldo who helps them get a single point lead on Barcelona and top the Table. Real Madrid feel that they have already been paid back the copious amounts of money required to purchase C.Ronaldo. Talk of Ronaldo being a contender for the Golden Boot and at an average of near a goal a game, there seems to be some merit behind an outrageous claim associated with him. Finally.

Early 2010-

Real Madrid lose their bid for a treble in their loss to a third division side in Spain during their league cup known as the Kings Cup. If memory serves me correctly, the goalie for the side that knocked Real Madrid out is actually a part time football player, who has to steal time away from his busy profession of mending fences during the week. The time it takes C.Ronaldo to swat a fly is the near equivalent of what the winning side pays their goalie per week. I calculated.

Somehow, this first setback is somewhat of a mulligan for C.Ronaldo who is loved by Real Madrids fans once again with a few spirited performances in the La Liga. Real Madrid fans decide that them now going on to win the double is somewhat acceptable. Jersey sales continue to remain strong.

– March 2010 –

Real Madrid are denied any further passage in the Round of 16 of the Champions League at the hands of Lyon, courtesy of a clinically struck half volley. Real Madrids players are reduced to tears and are in shock. The fans do not share their sorrow and the clubs president begins the La Liga tradition of receiving ultimatums in the board room. That Barcelona went on to lose to Inter Milan brought about a great sense of relief in the Santiago Bernabéu. Pep Guardiola apologizes to the people of Barcelona for first loss in a significant knock out tournament since taking the helm. Jersey sales have now paid for Christiano Ronaldos 94 Million transfer fee. Somehow.

– May 2010 –

Van Der Vart keeps Real Madrid in the season twice, but its all for nothing. Real Madrid are humiliated at their second encounter against Barcelona in the league, where the title is pretty much decided. Christiano Ronaldo and the city of Madrid have to settle for second place, which is ironically enough exactly where they were before they spent over 220 Million Euros on new players. By doing so they gifted Inter and Bayern Munich their Champions league Finals spot by selling them Sneijder and Robben to the their aforementioned clubs the same year. Newsflash, Christiano Ronaldo didn’t win the Golden Boot either falling an incredible 8 goals short of Lionel Messi who just so happens to play in the same league as him, removing any further possible excuses.


C.Ronaldo has not won a single piece of silverware in the last 12 months, despite having left Manchester United who seem to be getting along well enough in his absence seeing it as though without him everyone had written them off as no longer even being contenders. If anything, Christiano has been on the short end of the stick in terms of adding to his resume with a move that he asked for himself. He hadn’t scored a goal for his national team in months until their 7-0 spanking of the Korean DPR in the group stages of this World Cup and he was largely non-existent for the last 60 minutes of the knock out tie against Spain in the round of 16. He also spat at a camera to show the world how disappointed he was with his nations World Cup exit, which was on a 1-0 score line, largely his fault in that he should have been able to create at least one goal to put them in contention. Alright so having pointed all of this out, I just have one last thing to ask.

Why is the world so obsessed with him again?